The Quilt (Of Loss)

The Quilt (Of Loss)

Suspended memories are gathered
In fibrillated fabric patches
Laid vertical
Diagonal
And across

A tangible intangible
Moments of collected loss

A textured timeline
Silk sorrows
Soulfully plotted
Into the here and now
Their odes tightly knotted

Like the chord of the child
Who fell too early from my womb
Never to feel a proper embrace

There lies a square of a
Soft heirloom
A hand-made blanket of
Intricate lace

One heartbeat silenced
Replaced
By the sound of goodbyes
Cradled in this loving warm space
With tender lullabies

Sung by the voices of tears
From my eyes shed
In a time-signature measured
By stitches of thread

Sewn onto the batting
That cushions each void
With stitches for mending
Hands with stories
To embroid

Hands that still cling
While letting go
Hiding all that is gone
In the symbols
Of each row

Among them lies
A cloudy question mark
Embodying the whys

Lying in the palpable patchwork
Of deferred dreams
Unavailable files for download
Attached at the seams

I am the seamstress
Joining my grandparents’ garments
To my wedding gown
On a quilt of the quiets
Of memories handed down

A mosaic of swatches
Equally measured
With distinct coffee spoons
Of moments stirred
Treasured

In my chest while
My supple heart still thuds
Later wrapped around your skin when I am gone
As your life still buds

This something from nothing is set
In delicate weight cotton
Nestled and paused
Held and never forgotten

Side by side beside by side
Immemorable pieces of life
Are neatly tied
A childhood tee
A virginal veil
Synthetically woven
Synthesized they hide

A farewell to
The loss of innocence

Bound by a
Silver lining hope
Of permanence

Let it wrap you in my absence
When you seek to feel my skin
When my letting goes have ended
So may yours begin

And so I weaved
Thin thread
Holding on
Holding
In my hands
The fibers
Of what once was
Mine
Like I was braiding
Your hair
Before you left
For school
For Heaven
This god forsaken place
Ending with a twist
Interlaced strands
A trinity of tresses
United by a band
Elastic
Like my faith
Stretching
Wearing thin
Keeping it together
Until
It is snapped
In one swift motion
Of letting go

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